Bob Ong

The past few days have been quite a realization to me. 

From the point of praying hard for the 'perfect',if not a better man, up to this stage of being crucial to my career path. Yes i admit, i have been indulged to a polygamy relationship for almost a year (and both sides didn't know about this and am not proud with this!) and one thing i did that because i can't let go with the past. But that's not the issue here.

So the story goes with: 

My ex and i were okay. We were okay. We have been together for like 3years. Same with other normal couples, we also have that on and off, on and off, on and off. 

Not until that day of discovering of what should have been kept private. Yes i admit again that that discovery was slightly planned and i just wanna prove myself for some hard-kicking evidences and i got it right. You know, women's intuition. And to cut the story short, that relationship ended.

Hey, that wasn't the only reason but even before, we already have trust issues. Yes, this was his second chance and he blew it. And that's what i learned. If you already have issues with your partner, there's only smaller chances of making the relationship last longer and stronger. Dunno with the others but that applies to me.

Thought i was numb enough to be hurt but after an electronic confrontation, i feel like am slapped hard. Hard enough to make me weep but only for ten seconds. Truthfully, getting hurt is being human. It's inevitable. But it's okay. Am okay now. I think i have moved on. Guess this is a formal break-up yet never my breakdown.

As the cliche goes, not all things are permanent. Everything happens for a reason. I never regret a day. With him i learned to love. I learned to get mad. I learned to fight for the relationship. I learned the deeper meaning of patience and understanding. I learned to get hurt and fall so many times. But above all, i have learned to let go and forgive.

And i remembered a text message from one of my girlfriends, " If someone leaves you, then there's someone's coming who will love you more than the first one did". 

That was a perfect consolation to the emotions i held. It was a perfect comforting message which am learning to embrace 'coz it's the reality after all.

And by this, am actually trying to apply the same experience to my career issues. But right now, am in an observation state. I need to study the  situation first for me to hang on and plan for the options to move. I got to absorb all the scenarios and later on wait for that inevitable day to come and let everything happen.

I just hope that everything will fall into its proper places.